I attended the Writing for Wellness Seminars last month at Mission Hospital, in Mission Viejo, California.  This was put on by author of the “Writing for Wellness” book, Julie Davey and professional writer, Laura Seiler.  I was able to attend 3 of the 4 classes and they were great.  First, they fed you a nice lunch - free.  Second, it was all voluntary … if you shared or not.  You were never put on the spot to share.  I did read … or tried to read … and had Laura read it for me …. my “Addicted to Kleenex” short story (see a previous post on this blog) and after that I shared a few things.

This class taught me how to start writing, beginning, middle and end.  The book is filled with stories from patients, caregivers and survivors. 

One thing the book touched on and I did, was to write a thank you note to my Dad’s surgeon … about 4 years later than I had intended.  But… It made me feel good to do it!

When my Dad had surgery, I immediately wanted to thank the surgeon for all of his knowledge and skill at making a bladder out of a part of my Dad’s intestine!  Wow!!  Surgeons and other people in the health care field should be thanked more!

Click to see larger ..

One of our in-class writing assignments was to write about a place you are at peace …

Here’s mine ..

Paddling in my kayak in the peacefull morning at the harbor.

It takes a lot to get me there, but once I get out of bed, dress, drive, unload and get my kayak in the water, it is well worth the effort.

I paddle out and glide across the water.  It’s around 7 am and there are few people on the water.  it is quiet, peaceful, calming.

I paddle around the harbor island watching the ripples in the water, the birds, people walking on the island and a few other paddlers.  This is wonderful.  I need to do this more often.

I consider bringing my radio or iPod, but decide the quiet is better.

Maybe the next time I come out for a morning paddle I will bring my fishing rod and cast a few times, see if I can get a bite.  Now, that would be a nice morning.

I remember the time I brought my Dad kayak fishing.  I so wanted him to catch a fish., to feel the bite on his rod.  Although he didn’t catch any fish that day, I know he had a great time in my world on the water…

Tags: Family, kayaking, writing for wellness

My Kleenex addiction and how I’m beating it.

Kleenex piled up on the floor of the passenger side of my car became a common occurrence on the drive home from my parents. First they piled up when my Dad was fighting bladder cancer. His body was being beaten by cancer and seeing him so thin just made me cry on the way home. I was always strong in front of him, but alone in the car with the radio blaring, I let the tears flow.

Kleenex really piled up when my Mom was diagnosed with 4th stage kidney cancer 2 days before my Dad died. My eyes were puffy, red and sore and the Kleenex pile grew. I learned to pat my eyes and not rub them. I let the tears flow.

The Kleenex use continued through the next four months. Caring for my Mom, taking her to all of her appointments, radiation, Chemo, the Lab, etc… Seeing my Mom get weaker and weaker made my Kleenex pile grow in the car quite rapidly.

After my Mom passed away my Kleenex addiction grew. Sitting at my kitchen counter drinking beer, eating junk food and crying was a nightly occurrence. Handling the trust, two homes, and three brothers brought stress to a high level and the Kleenex was always there for me.

2 years for my Dad in April and for my Mom it will be in August. Kleenex and I still have a close relationship, but my use has really tapered off. The help of friends and family, a grief counselor and knowing my parents would want me to be happy has really helped.

Kleenex …  I should have bought some stock in you.

I still let the tears flow.

Tags: Crying, Grieving, Kleenex, Parents

The Carlsbad 5000 is on Sunday and I’m going to walk in it. It is a 5K walk which is 3.1 miles. I started walking in the Carlsbad 5000 with my Mom and her friends. My Dad’s cousin, Carolyn and a friend also walk and we would meet them for lunch afterwards. My stomach is a little knotted up right now because I haven’t walked for 2 years.  In 2008 we couldn’t walk as my Mom was diagnosed with cancer and my Dad had just passed away.  Last year came and I just couldn’t walk it. My Mom had passed away four months after my Dad and I just couldn’t do it. It’s weird because I handled everything else, my parents belongings, paperwork, even watching their wedding video (that was never put on a DVD until I found the tapes),  but it was just too hard to walk without my Mom. It makes me tear up just thinking about walking without my Mom.  This was our tradition.  Every year.  I know I’ll cry this year and it will be really hard. I’ll be walking with Carolyn and her friend and I do look forward to that. It will be a new tradition and something special to share with Carolyn.

Here’s a picture of my Mom and I walking -

Photographers for the race take your picture and you can then buy them on-line.  Or … just copy the fuzzy one they put on the web

Since I don’t wear boy-cut T-shirts, I cut the good part out and will make a quilt with all of my shirts.  Here they are - I think I’m missing one or two ??  hmmmm  where could it be?

We had also walked together in a few different 5K’s.  Here is a picture of the San Clemente Fiesta Walk -

And another year ..

Tags: Carlsbad 5000, Mom, Walking

I was talking to a customer in Florida today and we were talking about the different parts of Florida, what the weather was like, when he moved there, and then I brought up the beach on an island off of Florida that is full of shells.  He said “Sanibel Island”?  Yes, that’s the one.

Then I remembered.  I remembered that my Mom and I had talked about going to Sanibel Island and collecting shells.   I have a newspaper article that I have saved about this island.  We just had to see that beach, some day.

It’s been about a year and a half since my Mom died.  The tears came when I remembered this.  I had forgotten.

image from here image from here

Tags: Mom, sanibel island florida, shell collecting

We move through everyday life so fast.  We all have so much to do.  Days speed by.  We all need to stop and look at the beauty of our world.  I was driving yesterday and looked at the beautiful clouds.  I took a picture.  I enjoyed them.  We all need to slow down and enjoy the clouds, a sunset, a smile, a loving partner, child or friend.

Tags: clouds