My Kleenex Addiction

My Kleenex addiction and how I’m beating it.

Kleenex piled up on the floor of the passenger side of my car became a common occurrence on the drive home from my parents. First they piled up when my Dad was fighting bladder cancer. His body was being beaten by cancer and seeing him so thin just made me cry on the way home. I was always strong in front of him, but alone in the car with the radio blaring, I let the tears flow.

Kleenex really piled up when my Mom was diagnosed with 4th stage kidney cancer 2 days before my Dad died. My eyes were puffy, red and sore and the Kleenex pile grew. I learned to pat my eyes and not rub them. I let the tears flow.

The Kleenex use continued through the next four months. Caring for my Mom, taking her to all of her appointments, radiation, Chemo, the Lab, etc… Seeing my Mom get weaker and weaker made my Kleenex pile grow in the car quite rapidly.

After my Mom passed away my Kleenex addiction grew. Sitting at my kitchen counter drinking beer, eating junk food and crying was a nightly occurrence. Handling the trust, two homes, and three brothers brought stress to a high level and the Kleenex was always there for me.

2 years for my Dad in April and for my Mom it will be in August. Kleenex and I still have a close relationship, but my use has really tapered off. The help of friends and family, a grief counselor and knowing my parents would want me to be happy has really helped.

Kleenex …  I should have bought some stock in you.

I still let the tears flow.

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